smiley.

ahh.. :)

the good thing about crashing is that you're over and done with the next moment afters. the best thing about crashing though is knowing that you have people who love you be there for you.

hmm.. :)

i am planning a surprise and i hope all goes according to plan.
weeeeeeeeeeee! ooh, and i can't wait for 6PM.

muse

i've been trying out sketching faces again lately. i can never get it right. i always think they don't have ANY similarities to the subjects but now i think i see a bit. maybe i'm just tooting my own horn. lol. i blame the extra time in between after work and classes at uni. speaking of work, there are so many sunny's styles that i have to remember but my boss is the sweetest. i'm glad i fit in with the people at work. anyway, here's my favourite sketch so far :)

i appreciate how despite the circumstances,
you still find appreciation in the littlest things :)

an hour

happy earth hour, dear world :)

P/S: sometimes i wonder if it's worth all the trouble remembering people. they change ever so much, ever so quickly, ever so dramatically. maybe i should start remembering people just by their masks. no use trying your hardest going through the thousand layers behind it because when you think you finally understand them, they shed again. people change, faces don't.

it's been too long.

it's like a song i get lost in every time i hear it. i can't recall how it sounds like after it ends but every time it plays again, the familiar melody makes me fall in love with it all over again. and i get lost again.

pieces

this is so funny & unbelievable at the same time. i found my kindie mate who used to chase me around the playground, trying to propose to me. i don't know why i still remembered this piece of memory. i think it's really .. somehow exciting, strange and amusing when someone from your childhood memory appears out of nowhere, and after such a freakin' long time. and yeah, i accepted his proposal. HAHA :)

you know that chinese firecracker that people light during chinese new year or a grand opening. yes, the one that kinda looks like chilis hanging on the sides of a thin long rope. that's what the month of march is to me. birthdays everywhere and almost everyday! anyway, the presents above (wrapped personally by moi, teehee) belongs to melissa, yumi & johno. i recall leon mentioning how retro my style is - even in my wrapping style. oh well.

my saturday

my saturday's been productive. and no... i did not hit the waves. sigh. i'll definitely try and squeeze in some beach time before week 6 and after of week 7. not too devastated about it because i haven't found the perfect bikini to go with my planned escapade. plus, i need to round the girls together- dire need to get my girls away from the tight clutches of the men in their lives. i wonder if i sound like a bitter single woman after that last sentence. lol :)

i got two essay outlines done! i'm on a bloody roll, watch out!

sherlene & i hit the 'met' again with mouzam and shane. pretty mellow night, i reckon. disregard the pushing, shoving, ass-grabbing, breathe in your hair and just plain ugh strangers. anyway.. in regards to sherlene's post. yes, the 'game'.

it looks like i've been picking out the same kinda guy too. the 'quiet' one in the group. the one that comes off as snobbish .. but given the benefit of doubt, maybe just way too shy. or has a girlfriend for the matter, lol. always the so-called reserved, quiet and shy one. maybe i like the challenge. maybe i like to tease. maybe i find comfort in knowing that there's someone out there kinda like me. ivan & sherlene were discussing the other day about whether they'd date themselves. i said yes. without hesitation. i'd definately date me. such a narcissistic point of view, yes? hmm, dominant personalities intimidate and interest me at the same time but i know that i'll probably never be one amongst the lot. i prefer to shy away and let them have their moment in the spotlight. however, in a case where a 'shy' one and i were put together, i involuntarily and automatically mould myself to be the dominant of the two. sigh, i love comfort. that being said, i'm not concluding that i will never be attracted to the 'loud', opinionated and ladies man kind- it just takes a lot chemistry than the usual :)

off to bed. mwuah <3

fate

chemistry is probably the one of the rarest things that people could ever have with me the first time they meet me. with me, it'll take extra time (after 4-6 meets) to finally tell if we could eventually click. but last year, i met this person who, only after the first meet, we clicked. it felt so easy to talk and laugh with this person. we're few years apart, we don't quite share the same taste in music and movies, we belong to different cliques, and we have next to zero similar experiences in life. but we click. it's like exploring the world through another person. i think it's quite remarkable how chemistry works. anyway, somehow or rather we had a bit of a fall out towards the end of the year. i figured perhaps, our chemistry died along with the growing distance between us.

but today. today we accidently bumped into each other. i expected awkwardness and repetitive talks on the weather and well-being but no, we again, clicked. it was like time apart never happened. we were comfortable, we laughed, and we shared: conversations of travel, middle-child syndrome, pork, looking for fat louie, the angry cat, keropok lekor, etc. when it was time to go, i knew at the back of my mind, reasons why we were supposed to grow apart. we said our goodbyes, knowing this could probably be the 'last' time till God knows when. sigh, i miss this person. i miss the ease of being myself that this person brought. why do good things never seem to last?

the remedy

there are people who love to play God. people who feel obligated and concerned about others. genuinely, i suppose. so they proceed to do what they think is best to remedy the situation. and most of the time, things do work out. but people fail to see their own flaws. they forget they're only human and the human is prone to making an error in judgment once in a while. they cannot foresee the complete effect of their 'remedies' although they'd like to think they know it all. this is when help spirals into unnecessary heartache and tears for the people involved. but alas, you cannot blame these people who love to play God. but can you shy your eyes away from the people who've become hurt? perhaps it's time to learn to accept the fact that sometimes ignorance is the answer.

snippets

i don't know why but i rarely go crazy with the camera as i do in brisbane, here in KK. anyways, here's a few about CNY. ooh, i went through music CDs i burnt 1/2 years ago and am loving lionel richie's 'i call it love' again. catchy melody :)

mum, dad & i


grandma, grandpa & i


my youngest cousin, jason


joanne, my cousin who is sweet16 this year


camwhore/ drunk girlfriend/ best friend & i


friends: dayze, aaron, gloria, nazman, adam & lee swee chee

pissy people.

take a cue from disney,

if you can't say anything nice,
DON'T say nothing at all.

seriously.

give/take

you'd be surprised how many people forget to 'take' because they focus so much on 'giving' when it comes to relationships. maybe that's one reason why people give up so easily. they think they can't give enough / give too much & expect the same in return.

a beautiful liar

i don't get some people. their words contradict .. continuously.

22

i swear i'm wiser now. .. or maybe i wish i was. i shall be! here's to self-fulfilling prophecies! :)

thank you everyone who made me smile & made my day extra special.
(in no particular order)

mummy & daddy. sherlene. selina. sherwynna. cyrus. nanda. derek. leon. yumi. sherman. dayze. michelle may.uncle lee. cynthia. evan. kenny. jason foo. jason phoon. aunty betty. uncle john. joanne. jason. mymy. eudo. chan. sharon. edgar. vivienne. jenet. aaron. nazman. fazila. chau. flo. ivan. chung pui ling. anne. reza. sarah-jane. wenard. melissa. allen. masood. mouzam. raja.

and if i left you out, let me know & i apologise in advance!
i *heart* yous.

solace

after every devastating break up, we're so convinced, "i'll never love that away again". you know what, you're right. what's between you and him/her is special and it belongs in a red heart-shaped box buried somewhere deep in your memories. no one can ever take that away. but i promise you, you will love again and honestly, that's all that matters :)

P/S: talked to one of my exes just now. we webcam-ed a little while. the way he talked, looked, sounded .. it was exactly as i remembered. you know how you just know when someone's changed. but he didn't. or at least i didn't get the vibe. he said i did. a lot. and the funny thing is, i agree. if i asked the 'me' exactly one year ago to meet the 'me' now, it would be like 2 strangers meeting for the first time. hmm, but i think, honestly, if you dug deeper, there's still fragments of the old 'me' and i'm glad. anyway, it was nice to talk to a familar face again. the same person i once seeked solace with. i'm glad we can talk like old times. i'm glad we both got out of 'us' okay and we can smile and laugh about it now. i wish nothing but the best for him. i am eternally grateful that our paths crossed.

regret

was lazing about in the living room with sherlene today. 'one tree hill' was on tv. this quote got me thinking. i concur. going out tonight, fingers crossed to having fun. here's to living life! ;)

PEYTON:
I know Alzheimer’s is this terrible disease but at least Mel doesn’t have to live with his regrets. You know? And all the mistakes he made and the stuff he wishes he could take back.

MOUTH:
Yeah, that’s true. But I say give me regret as long as I can keep the good memories too. We all have regrets, Peyton. But some of us still have enough time to erase them.

shame on you

"Oho!' said the pot to the kettle;
"You are dirty and ugly and black!
Sure no one would think you were metal,
Except when you're given a crack."

"Not so! not so! kettle said to the pot;
" 'Tis your own dirty image you see;
For I am so clean -without blemish or blot-
That your blackness is mirrored in me"

-"Maxwell's Elementary Grammar" school book copyright 1904